"Ugh, I'm hungry."
"You're always hungry."
"Are we home yet?"
"One more block to go." *deep sigh*
"What are we going to eat when we get home?"
"Whatever mom left out for us."
"Do you think she left us PJ and B again? I love PJ and B."
"It's PB and J. And no, I don't think she left us PB and J because I told her if I had to eat another peanut butter sandwich I was going to use your brains for jelly. Considering you have any, that is."
"We could raid the snack cupboard again."
"She put a lock on it after you 'sleep walked' and ate an entire box of chocolate chip cookies, remember?"
"Right. We could always-"
"Oh hush, we're here. Do you smell that?"
"The house smells good."
"The house smells like-"
"Out of my way."
"Ow. There's a table there."
"There's a note."
"Yeah, what's it say? Oh, that's right. You can't read. Give me that. Hmm...it says Alicia, please lock your sister in the closet, the one where we keep all the spiders and scorpions and ghosts."
"It does not. What does it really say?"
"I baked cinnamon rolls for the office so I had to take most of them to work with me, but I left a couple on a plate in the cupboard so Smokey wouldn't get to them. Enjoy. Love...blah blah blah. Hey, wait for me."
"Get down from there."
"Oh, no. It didn't work. Are any of them any good?"
"There's one that isn't half eaten and doesn't have a hairball coughed up on it."
"One? What are we supposed to do? Share?"
"We can cut it in half."
"And cut right through the middle? The center's the best part, you can't eat just half of that. We'll have to cut it lopsided. I'm the oldest. I get the bigger half."
"But I'm hungrier. And cuter."
"Bigger always wins."
"I know! We could unravel the cinnamon roll long wise and cut it in half from there. And we can roll a dice to see who gets the middle."
"Hmmm.... That's not half bad, for a half wit. Let's do it."
"That's not even."
"Is too. I folded it so each half is exactly the same, see?"
"Fine. But leave the middle on the plate. I don't trust you to hold it."
"Mom! You're home early."
"What are you doing to your cinnamon rolls?"
"It was my idea! We had to share because Smokey ate the others and puked on one of them. But we saved the middle for last and we're going to roll for it. I'm good with the-."
"Dumb cat. Turn our backs for one second and you eat the best part?"
"And now he's throwing it up on the carpet. Awesome."
"What now? I was going to get the middle. I'm great at rolling dice. I always get the high number."
"That's because we let you."
"Hey, both of you. It's okay. I sneaked two more home from the office. I was going to save them for your father, but he's technically on a diet. So what he doesn't know won't kill him, right?"
"What's for dinner?"